The Transition… Relaxed to Natural

Transitioning from relaxed hair to natural is a big step to consider. In the beginning the process can be frustrating.  You may want to cave in and go back to a relaxer, but I’m here to tell you that  going natural will be the best decision that you ever make. The first step is to decide if you want to make the big chop and cut off all your hair with no traces of your relaxer. Or if you want to cut out the straight hair up to your new growth where your hair is at it natural form. You will then decide, “how will I wear my hair”? There are many different styles to choose from depending on your hair texture and the style you want to achieve. You can can try hairstyles from braids, twist outs, rod sets and the list goes on.

YouTube is a great place to see different styles with tutorials, to help you along the way. During the transitioning phase you should avoid heat (air dry hair after washing) and no straightening of your hair. You should use a deep conditioner once a week to avoid breakage. Trimming your hair, drinking plenty water, taking vitamins or maintaining a healthy diet. We are what we eat and our hair is apart of our body.  When it comes to keeping your hair moisturized and shining. You can use the following oils for healthy hair growth: coconut oil, olive oil, almond oil, argan oil, jojoba oil and tea tree oil. You can mix the following oils together or opt out of some of the oils. I would recommend doing a skin check for allergies.

Good luck on your transition and the key is to “Be Patient”. 







Hair Shaming

There’s been a big debate over straightening young girls hair and the comments been harsh.  I’m a mom with a young daughter who has curly thick hair. I told myself, I would never put a relaxer in her hair and to keep it healthy as possible. I do the ponytail styles and twist her hair at times. (She did not like her hair braided with multiple braids)  When she was in kindergarten she asked me several times to straighten her hair and the answer was always no. Her dad also was against me straightening her hair, with fear of it not coming back to it natural state. Time went on and I did some research. I first thought it would be best to have a licensed and professional hairstylist do her hair. I searched for someone who specifically specialized in natural hair. I didn’t want to take her to a salon where they spent the whole day relaxing people hair. I wanted someone who knew the importance of taking care of natural hair. I took her in and they washed, deep conditioned, trimmed and straightened her hair. She was so happy with the outcome. She was swinging it all over the place, not that she didn’t do it before with her ponytails. I maintained her hair with daily moisturizer with natural oils and after a few weeks it was time to wash her hair. It went back to her natural hair of being curly and I twisted it back to the styles I did.

We recently moved to a predominately Caucasian area where there is about 1% of African-Americans. She is the only black girl in her class and she came home from school  one day and asked if I could straighten her hair again. My first thought was, “did someone say something to my baby”. I began to think, did she want to look like the other girls in her class who had straight hair? It was time for me to have “the talk” with her. It was going to be more than talking about hair. I was about to talk to her about different races. (We previously lived in an African-American community and her classmates were all black). I told her she didn’t have the same hair like the other girls in class and that she was African-American and our hair was a different texture. I told her that she was special and beautiful, I told her she should be different from other people and not to want to look like everyone else. I told her some kids who hair is straight, wished that their hair was curly. I tell her everyday that she’s a queen and she beautiful. I tell her it’s okay to look different. I believe if we teach our children about confidence and how to love themselves daily they will have positive self-esteem for themselves. 

I believe and we all have our own opinions, that if you decide to straighten your child hair it shouldn’t be done on a daily basis and if you do straighten it, keep it healthy. Everyone has the right to wear their hair the way they want as long as they’re taking a healthy approach to it. I recently asked her why she wanted her hair straightened? She told me”I just want to wear my hair different”. I was fine with that. She see me with different hair styles. I wear my hair natural, with braids, and wigs. Why do I change my hair? “Because I want my hair to look different and I get bored with the same hairstyle.” 

I think parents shouldn’t be hair shamed over their choices. I believe we need to teach the importance of having healthy hair. I believe it’s okay to want to change your look.